One of my roles as a psychotherapist is being a behavioural health provider.
I help people address issues that occur due to behaviour or those that arise from underlying mental health issues.
The goal is to see people heal themselves, have positive thought patterns, and cultivate healthy behaviours.
With the scourge of substance abuse and violence within our society, I have been wondering how biological, social, spiritual, and behavioural factors influence each other.
For instance, during my work with the boy child, I realise that we have a problem of substance abuse in our communities.
This is quite sad.
The question is who are our young boys looking up to for guidance?
How are they navigating the transition from being boys to becoming men?
As I was pondering about this, I came across a couple of important tips from Quora digest newsletter.
I added some ideas that I collected from the males that I have worked with.
This article will share some of the tips on how to groom the boy child as he transition into a man.
These habits can help boys develop important qualities and characteristics that will serve them well as they grow into responsible, capable, and mature men.
Maintaining physical and mental health
Let’s help our boys take care of their physical and mental health by exercising regularly, eating well, getting enough sleep, and managing stress in healthy ways.
Teach them it’s okay to seek help when they are not feeling well.
Communicating effectively
Being understood and accepted are universal human needs that can be achieved by communicating effectively.
Getting in touch with our feelings and thoughts helps us as humans to understand ourselves.
Sharing feelings and thoughts helps others to understand us better also.
So boys should learn how to communicate and know it’s okay to have a trusted person to communicate their inner experiences and feelings.
Let’s open up safe spaces for young boys to express themselves in a way that can help them to clearly and respectfully listen to others.
Help boys recognise and understand their emotions.
The restriction of emotional expression in many men’s lives is risky and can lead them to have serious behavioral, social, and mental health issues.
Foster positive problem-solving skills
Help boys develop effective problem-solving skills.
Teach them to think critically, consider different perspectives, and find constructive solutions to conflicts.
Promoting responsibility
Teach boys about the importance of taking responsibility for their actions.
Encourage them to own up to their mistakes, apologize when necessary.
This requires them to realize that they play a part in every situation or experience and, therefore, have some degree of responsibility over outcomes or consequences.
Healthy men should take responsibility for their actions and decisions, and they do not make excuses or blame others for their mistakes.
They have to learn to stand up for themselves and their constructive beliefs.
Practicing integrity
This is when we teach our boys to learn to do the right thing through their words, actions and beliefs, even when no one is watching.
Healthy men act with integrity by being honest, ethical, and consistent in their words and actions.
Pursuing life-long learning
Let us teach our boys the importance of attaining knowledge and learning.
Help them develop a learning mindset.
As men they need to be curious and look for learning opportunities; They need to be committed to improving themselves and their skills throughout their lives.
Developing self-discipline
We need to help our young boys develop self-discipline, a set of goals and work towards fulfilling them. Self-discipline allows them to stay focused on meaningful goals.
It enables them to stay in control of themselves and of their reaction to situations. They need to learn how to reflect their actions and do things differently where possible.
Self-discipline is like a muscle: the more you train it, the stronger you become.
Lack of self-discipline can cause low self-esteem. Some men engage in destructive anti-social behavior because of low self-esteem.
So let us help them in this.
Being accountable
Men are accountable to themselves and to others, and they need to follow through on their commitments.
Being there
If it comes down to one thing you can do, this is it.
Let’s be there for our boys and offer them guidance, ask them about their experiences, and tell them how special they are.
Surround your child with unconditional love, attention, and care.
Promote positive role models
This is something that our boys are yearning for – they need role models.
Our boys are looking for some adults who can inspire them, teach them, build them, provide support and insight.
As role models, we need to be showing our boys how to live.
Do they have role models that guide them to develop themselves to full potential?
When it comes to fostering better behavior in boys, it’s important to approach it in a holistic and positive manner.
Remember, every child is unique, and it’s important to tailor your help to their individual needs and personality.
Cultivating a strong and healthier foundation of a sense of responsibility, accountability, communication, and developing self-discipline will help boys develop into respectful, healthy, and well-rounded citizens.
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One of my roles as a psychotherapist is being a behavioural health provider.
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