8 months ago
Just received my first rejection letter
in fifteen years
after fifteen years of creative celibacy
The (1) in my Gmail tab had my heart aflutter
before my brain could even say "Careful, love,
We've been down this road before"
Nah, I welcome your congratulations
That prize money is in the bag
Yeah, I might be able to fly out to do a reading
on my victory lap, to your adulation, thank you
I assume my travel costs will be covered?
I'd forgotten the sting of "Unfortunately ... "
A template personalized with just my initials
(Pen names are not shields)
at the top to let me know it isn't personal
It feels personal
Out of over 600 submissions
mine was not the best
Even though it felt Nobel-worthy while writing it
Turns out, barely noteworthy
Didn't even make the short list
What a welcome back after 15 years
And yet
Thank you for your consideration
Because I wouldn't have written a word
had I not been enticed, challenged,
to allow myself back in
after 15 years of self-exile
For just a few minutes of reading time
my words were centre stage
kissed the limelight
illuminating
I'd be a hypocrite
Unfortunately, I too could pick a favourite
out of over 600
knowing it will break 600 "Dear [name]" hearts
Who am I to judge?
I am, indeed, just grateful for the opportunity
to write again
not because it proves
I can.
Because it proves
I did.
Just received my first rejection letter
in fifteen years
after fifteen years of creative celibacy
The (1) in my Gmail tab had my heart aflutter
before my brain could even say "Careful, love,
We've been down this road before"
Nah, I welcome your congratulations
That prize money is in the bag
Yeah, I might be able to fly out to do a reading
on my victory lap, to your adulation, thank you
I assume my travel costs will be covered?
Click
I'd forgotten the sting of "Unfortunately ... "
A template personalized with just my initials
(Pen names are not shields)
at the top to let me know it isn't personal
It feels personal
Out of over 600 submissions
mine was not the best
Even though it felt Nobel-worthy while writing it
Turns out, barely noteworthy
Didn't even make the short list
What a welcome back after 15 years
And yet
Thank you for your consideration
Because I wouldn't have written a word
had I not been enticed, challenged,
to allow myself back in
after 15 years of self-exile
For just a few minutes of reading time
my words were center stage
kissed the limelight
illuminating
I'd be a hypocrite
Unfortunately, I too could pick a favorite
out of over 600
knowing it will break 600 "Dear [name]" hearts
Who am I to judge?
I am, indeed, just grateful for the opportunity
to write again
not because it proves
I can.
Because it proves
I did.
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