The nights grow colder

and my heart refuses to ice over.

Walking through the city at night,

I still smell your cologne

in passing alleys.

I hear laughter in the distance,

and wonder if your laugh will

escape the crowd and kiss my ears.

Every car I see go by

I wonder if it’s you

listening to music

escaping your own thoughts.

I never realized how lonely nights were

until the last night I was with you.

I never realized how quiet my own apartment was

until the sound of your footsteps vanished

never returning to click against my own floors.

Every pass of my front door causes me to glance up

wondering if you’re on the other side

hesitant to knock one final time.

Are you thinking about me still?

Or has the cloud that took you away

also taken away your thoughts of me?

I’ve never missed someone so much

that my heart feels like an erupted volcano

pouring lava all throughout my body and soul.

They say time heals these types of wounds,

but time is only causing more pain

and more thoughts of you.

My hands are so cold lately

without yours intertwined with mine.

My bed feels cold every night,

and no amount of tossing and turning

can fill the void you once occupied.

The drinks don’t help anymore,

they just make me wish you were there

enjoying the mayhem with me.

I see your face in every crowd

and I never liked crowds.

I’ve never claimed to have a home

until my eyes had met yours

through the smoke and laughter.

Will I ever hear your laugh again?

Will my words still make your heart flutter

the next time we meet?

Is the universe so cruel that she would take away

the one thing that made me believe in love?

They say if you love something, let it go

and if it returns, it’s meant to be.

I have always struggled to let go

and being comfortable with the idea

of something never coming back.

The sheet of ice I live on

gets smaller every day.

The love I have for you grows stronger

and yet for what?

Will it benefit me more to hold onto to you?

Or will it destroy me from the inside out?

How can something so good be so painful

and vile?

How can the world see this as the best decision

for two souls interlocked so closely

and fit into each other like puzzle pieces?

Things like this have never made sense to me

and they continue to cause me so much confusion.

I still reach for my phone as if I’ll see your name

light up my screen.

I wake up every morning and reach to my side

expecting to feel your warmth there

but there’s nothing but coldness and emptiness.

Does your bed feel as lonely as mine nowadays?

I still find memories of you throughout my home

and hold them close,

as if it’s the same as holding you in my arms again.

I miss you,

and I hope in the back of my mind and my heart

that you miss me too.

Meet the Author

View Profile

---

WINFRED KWAO

Blogger And Article writer

follow me