A day ago
Heaven and hell exist within us. They are mental, emotional, and physical states.
Sins are decisions that lead to our self-destruction, or stop our growth, and they're not always overtly evil, like murder. They’re also not an action that earns you a ticket to eternal fire and brimstone.
Any desire that we do not have control of becomes a sin, and a sin can be anything, not just the usual suspects that make some of us lose control, like sex, drugs, and alcohol. A sin is anything that leads you away from happiness, which is heaven. What is your state of heaven? Once you have figured out what heaven looks like for you, then you know which decisions will prevent you from reaching your heaven. They are your own personal sins.
The decisions we make lead to either a state of heaven or a state of hell, and these decisions are different for everyone. My state of heaven may not be someone else’s heaven.
A decision may seem innocent enough in the beginning, but over time it can lead to a state of hell. Toxic relationships can be a sin. If you continue to keep someone in your life who has put you into a state of hell, that action becomes a sin.
I know heaven and hell exist on earth because I used to be in hell. I was dealing with a chronic disease, which I’m still managing, but I’m miles ahead of where I used to be.
I worked a job with decent pay and benefits, yet every morning when my alarm went off, I’d groan at the thought of going to work. When I returned, I’d have a glass or two of wine. I didn’t realize having a drink was affecting my mood, sleep, and energy.
I wasn't writing, which is my passion, because I was too tired.
I was single and reaching an age when women begin to panic about the possibility of being childless forever.
I was generally unhappy, and I didn’t even know. It wasn’t until I was faced with losing my rectum and large intestine when I began making changes.
The healing journey has been long and somewhere along the way it turned spiritual, which I think is inevitable. Healing asks us to reconnect with ourselves on a deeper level than we’re used to.
Having a glass of wine with dinner is not necessarily committing sin. It’s a sin when the drink is the one in control and not the person drinking it. Hangovers can feel hellish, but alcohol can have negative long-term effects on health and mood, and it can prevent growth in life.
Society deemed masturbation's a sin a long time ago, and this always caused me to feel a sense of guilt about it. I came to realize that perceiving any part of my body as shameful is not a healthy. I am sexual being, and masturbation's can be a healthy expression of that. Masturbation's is not a sin, except when the desire controls the person, in which case it can become a decision that leads to a state of hell.
Everything that has been required of me on this journey has been about the pursuit of happiness, and with that realizing which decisions lead to long-term happiness. Short-term happiness consist of activities that bring happiness while engaging in them, but does not afford growth. In order to pull myself out of a state of hell and towards a state of heaven, I had to make decisions that lead to long-term happiness, which led to a complete overhaul of my life.
I’ve changed the way I eat. I write everyday. I quit my job. I engage in activities that I enjoy, and stay away from the ones that only feel good in the moment. It has been a slow crawl out of hell because my sins weren’t always clear in the beginning. Life is a journey to get to heaven, which is a place on earth.
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