I left you all in suspense after my first article, but I believe that to better understand my journey we had to start at the very beginning. I might not recall every detail or be able to share a complete medical history with you, but I assure you it’s all going to make sense soon. This journey has been very emotional with a lot of support not always in the best way but with limited understanding and knowledge, I cannot hold any grudges.
The most important thing for me is to create awareness about a rare condition that can easily make a person feel alone when that should never be the case. Let’s dive into my diagnosis now. About five (5) months to the end of my National Service, I went home because I could barely keep any food or drink down, and I was too weak to work. Tests resumed again and nine years later after symptoms started, it was confirmed that I had Achalasia.
Achalasia is a rare disorder that makes it difficult for food and liquid to pass through the oesophagus into the stomach. This occurs when the nerves in the oesophagus or swallowing tube (for better understanding) are damaged, so the oesophagus loses the ability to move food down into the stomach. If the food can’t go down, what happens to it then? It comes back up, unfortunately, sometimes even fermented. Impossible to get used to this sight or smell, and once this happens (regurgitation) it’s hard to eat again for quite some time.
Achalasia is mostly mistaken for Gastro-oesophageal Reflux Disease (GERD) but with Achalasia, the regurgitated food comes from the oesophagus while with GERD it comes from the stomach. Symptoms include; difficulty swallowing (dysphagia), regurgitation of food and saliva, heartburn, belching, chest pain, coughing at night, pneumonia, weight loss, and vomiting. These symptoms generally worsen over time, as Achalasia is a progressive disease.
Quite often I have had to choose between food on one side sleep, conversations, relationships, friendships, work etcetera on the other aside. What I mean by this is that if I am tired and sleepy, I can’t eat because it takes a long time for me to eat, and I would have to wait at least two hours before I can sleep. I’ve never been much of a talkative but having Achalasia has made things worse, I guess I would rather be boring than starve myself just to go out and mingle. To date, people around me talk about how I smile easily and avoid conflicts, but I must confess that these actions are mostly the easiest way to avoid talking or doing too much when I’m not feeling comfortable or weak.
Let us delve more into what is called my unapproachable look. That is me looking like I’m never ready for a conversation or my mind is a million miles away. I have to admit that is how I often feel, as the condition constantly keeps me on my toes. I get spasms (pain in the chest, back, neck, ears, jawline, and headaches) that make me want to curl up in bed, trust me the last thing on my mind is my facial expression or hurting someone’s feelings. Likewise, I also struggle with speech when I’m having spasms, and sometimes I completely avoid talking, especially when eating, so I can focus on carefully chewing my food, so I don’t choke on it or rush to the toilet every few minutes.
In times like this, don’t even try disturbing or rushing my eating process because all I can do is smile, nod, take a walk, and hope that I don’t vomit on someone on the way to the toilet or swallow my vomit. One can never be prepared for every situation that arises because I could be comfortable with something one moment and the next minute I’m in pain or vomiting. I could go on and on, but I won’t, what I would like you to do is think about how receptive you are to people’s problems, or do you feel you would have handled things better in the same situation?
Please note that I am not a medical professional and every piece of information I share is based on my research, experiences, and struggles. I hope that it would be of help to someone else.
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