Sometimes, it is only right to briefly turn the lights of the future off so we could take a walk back into the beautiful storage places of yesteryear. It is only right to remain shackled to the bliss of the past rather than face the pain and anguish of the present or even dive into the foggy wide void of the future. It is only right to remain a coward for the love of family than be brave if bravery means the loss of the people we care about. Who else is of the view that this life is nothing short of a mere dance at the festival of madness? How beautiful then can the future of this dance get when the drummers keep falling off even before the drumbeats could change?
The respective childhoods of the grand children of Madam Vicentia Agbenyo could be described as fairy tales considering the many magical moments that filled them. Despite hating farm work, none among us would miss the farm if Dada was leading the way. She would share the days work among us even though she knew we would only work like mice and we would pretend to be busy until she brings out the special gifts that always lay embedded in her own sack. As children, none of us knew how much we were learning simply by following what to us were strict principles. How could we have known that the woman who lay lifeless today was instilling a spirit of hard work and uprightness within us then? One principle in her house is: “Do not steal.” Be rest assured that she would not spare the rod if she finds anyone culpable of theft. She also instilled the spirit of teamwork and responsibility in us by making sure that everyone is held accountable even when only one of is involved in any wrongdoing.
As adults, her words of advice and encouragement stuck with us in everything we do. Sometimes, when we meet, there could be no better discussion than the memories of the beautiful evening we spent by the fire side playing beautiful games with granny. There could be nothing more amusing than the memories of our grandmother tricking us into following her to the farm. Despite being a woman of very few words, her action oriented lifestyle always compensated for the lack of words.
Today we mourn; for the woman who has always been the rock of this house has fallen at a time when we least expect her to. We are however reminded of Dada’s fervent resolve to urge us on in life and to also keep us mindful of the concept of right and wrong at all times. We will therefore remain steadfast for her memory’s sake. We will soldier on and we will make her gentle soul proud.
And for those who condole with us in this moment of grief and abstract uncertainty, please be reminded that death is but the ocean upon which the slave ships sailed; do not curse the water, it brought us here and would lead us home and when we are finally home, no mount of blessing here would supersede the peace and love there. This is what we take solace from.
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