?????*RAGE??*?????
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?????_EPISODE 19_?????
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After shopping the next day for a baby gift Calvin and
Dawn went to visit Susan and the new baby at the
hospital.
"We named her Sunny," Hank said excitedly.
"Would you like to hold her Dawn?" Susan asked.
She took the baby and looked at the tiny bundle nestled in
her arms. Memories of her own baby brought tears to her
eyes. "She's so perfect Susan. I'm so happy for you."
She handed the baby to Calvin, watching as he stared
down at the sleeping infant. She saw the love and desire
in his eyes and knew he'd make a great father.
Dawn walked over to the window and looked out. She did
not want the others seeing the tears in her eyes. If she
wasn't sure before about leaving she was now. Yes! she
was making the right decision. This way Calvin could find
a woman who could give him the children he so wanted.
When Hank noticed Dawn standing quietly by the window
looking so forlorn he went to her. "Are you ok? I'm sorry if
this upsets you."
"No Hank, I'm ok. And I am so very happy for you and
Susan." She smiles and gives him a hug.
The day came, the paper for the sale of the ranch was
signed. Dawn was all packed and ready to go. She was
meant to leave later that day. But when Calvin drove into
town for some supplies she decided to leave while he
was gone.
He had only been gone ten minutes when she heard the
front door opening.
"I'm back, I forgot my wallet." He shouts out.
He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Dawn and her
bags by the entrance, he fought to hold back his tears.
"So you're leaving. What the hell, were you going to leave
without so much as a goodbye? Don't I deserve better
than that?"
Dawn's eyes dropped to the floor, biting on her bottom lip
to keep them from trembling. "I thought it would be easier
this way."
"Easier for who?" He yelled, making her jump.
"For both of us." She whimpered.
Calvin crossed the room, his heart was breaking when he
took her in his arms. He could feel her trembling, knowing
this was also tearing her apart, and couldn't understand
why she would leave. "I love you, Dawn." He takes her
face in his hands, staring into her eyes. The very eyes that
were capable of bringing him to his knees. "When you get
back to Paris, and you change your mind and want to
come back, I'll be here waiting for you. No matter how
long it takes."
His words spoken with so much passion made her cry.
"No Calvin. I want you to find someone to love and have
a family with."
"There will never be anyone else but you. I will never stop
loving you." A tear fell down his face.
Seeing his tears was too much for her. She pulled away,
reaching for her bags but he beat her to it, carrying them
to the car.
"I'll go with you to the airport." He said, his voice
cracking.
"No. I don't want you to." She reached up, giving him a
quick hug. Jumping into the car she drove off. The tears
fell freely when she saw Calvin in the rearview mirror, as
he stood there watching as she drove away.
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Calvin felt as though his heart had stopped beating, he
wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Without Dawn, all of
this seemed pointless, life for him ceased to mean
anything. Sitting down on the porch steps he buried his
head in his arms. Though it was warm out, he felt a chill.
He saw Hank's car pulling up but was in no mood for
company.
Hank stopped his car and sat watching Calvin. Not sure
what he could do to help his friend, but knew had to try.
Going over and sitting next to Calvin put his hand on his
shoulder. "Are you really just going to sit here and let her
leave?"
"Do you think I want her to go?" He said when he looked
at Hank. "It's what Dawn wants. I can't force her to stay if
her heart belongs in Paris."
"That's not what she wants, that girl loves you," Hank said
as he stared at Calvin.
"I know she does, and I asked her to stay. I asked her to
marry me, but she wants to go back."
"No Calvin she doesn't. I know for a fact that she wants
to stay here, with you." Hank said with such force it made
Calvin perk up.
He narrowed his eyes when he looked at Hank. "Why do
you say that? What aren't you telling me, Hank?"
"Ok, listen to me. Dawn wants a life with you, the girl
doesn't even like living in Paris. The only reason she's
leaving is for you."
Calvin was becoming angry and barked at Hank. "How do
you know this? And why the hell is she leaving me then?"
Hank looked at his friend and wondered how much he
should tell him. He didn't want to betray Dawn's trust.
"Dawn told me that day we stayed behind at the ranch.
She broke down crying and told me why she had to
leave."
Calvin jumped up, ready to punch Hank if he had to. "If
Dawn doesn't want to leave then why is she? God damn it
Hank tell me."
"I can't tell you. I gave her my word, and you know me, I
won't break it. Go after her, get Dawn to tell you."
Calvin felt as though his heart was going to burst, for the
first time in days he had hope. Hope that whatever the
reason was she felt she had to leave, that he had a
chance of changing her mind. Without saying another
word he dashed over to his truck and took off. He was
more determined than ever to find out the truth, and to
get her to stay.
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It was so hot, and the air conditioner in her car was not
working. What made things worst were her tears, blinding
her as she drove. Leaving Calvin was harder than she ever
imagined it would be. The pain shooting through her heart
felt like hundreds of knives piercing into it.
Lost in thought she didn't hear the truck approaching till it
was side by side with her car. Looking over she could see
Calvin waving, signaling for her to pull over. Shaking her
head she yells out the window. "Go away, Calvin."
Knowing how stubborn she could be he pulled ahead and
turning on an angle stopped. Causing Dawn to stop.
Inches from hitting him.
Jumping out of his truck he went over to her.
"Calvin, what do you think you were doing? I almost ran
into you." She screamed at him.
He didn't answer. He opened the door and reaching in
undid her seatbelt. Grabbing her arm pulled her out of the
car.
"Let go of me. What do you think you're doing?"
"I'm stopping you from making the biggest mistake of
your life. We love each other and I'm not letting you go."
Dawn pulled away and turned around, crossing her arms.
"We've been through all this. I told you I love my job and
living in Paris. I want to go back." She tried with all her
might to sound convincing.
Grabbing her he swung her around to face him, clutching
her shoulders he swore. "That's bullshit, Dawn. I know you
don't want to leave me. Hank told me. So now I want you
to tell me why, why are you leaving?"
Through tears, she looked at him. "Hank didn't tell you?"
"No, he wouldn't. Tell me, damn it." He held on tightly to
her shoulders, looking into her eyes.
Lowering her eyes, she spoke in a soft whisper, he could
barely hear her. "Please Calvin, what does it matter?"
"What does it matter?" He answered in anger. "It matters
because I love you. After, all that's happened there's
nothing you can say that should keep us apart. Damn it,
Dawn, tell me." He yelled, shaking her.
"Ok, ok," She cried. "I can't have children. I-I can never
give you the children you want."
He backed away, then started laughing.
She glared at him, horrified by his insensitive reaction.
"It's not funny, why are you laughing?"
"You're right, it's not funny. Have you lost your mind? I
want you, with or without children."
She looked up at him all teary eyed. "I know how much
you want a family. If I leave you can find someone to
love. One who can give you babies."
Taking her face in both of his hands gave her a warm
smile, his eyes filling with tears. "Oh, baby doll, It's only
you I want to have a family with. But if that's not possible,
then so be it. I can live without having children, but I can't
live without you."
Dawn moves away from Calvin and shakes her head no.
"You say that now, but someday down the road, you'll end
up resenting me."
"You're wrong. I've loved you my whole life. Nothing can
ever change that. Dawn, look at me."
She does what he say's, waiting for him to talk.
"I love you. Marry me Dawn and I promise I'll always take
care of you." He had a feeling she was keeping something
else from him. "What is it that you're not telling me?"
Leaning against the car she wiped her tears before
looking at him. He wanted to go to her and wipe her tears
away. But he sensed she needed a bit of space between
them. So he waited for her to speak.
After being in Paris for about four months I discovered I
was pregnant." She stopped talking when she saw the
look of anger cross his face.
He felt as though someone had punched him in the gut,
feeling ill. Not bothering to let her explain he lashed out,
his words cruel and harsh. "Well, it didn't take you long to
sleep with someone else."
Dawn was hurt that he could think such a thing about her.
Unable to speak she just stood there, letting him go on
with his accusations.
"For years I've long for you. I didn't date, I was a mess. All
I could think about was you." He looked at Dawn with
disgust. "And you couldn't wait to jump into bed with
another. How could you do that to me? To us? My God,
did you not ever love me?"
Dawn was so furious she went over and slapped his face.
"You jerk, of course, I loved you. How could you think
otherwise? I cried myself to sleep every night for years,
missing you."
Calvin scoffed. "You must have stopped crying long
enough to get pregnant."
"No. It was years before I could bring myself to be with
anyone." She walked to her car, turned to look at Calvin.
"Now that I know what you really think about me I'm
leaving."
He grabbed her arm and wouldn't let go. " No, don't go."
Dawn's shoulders shook when she broke down and
started crying, covering her face with her hands.
His heart was racing, beads of sweat appeared on his
face as the meaning behind her words sunk in. "My God,
you were carrying my baby. I'm so sorry. But why didn't
you tell me we have a child? Where is it? Do we have a
boy or girl?"
She sank down to the ground and wept. He sat down next
to her. "Dawn." He whispered her name.
She reached up and touched his face, feeling the stubble
that was growing there. "A girl, a beautiful little girl." She
started crying again. There was an empty spot in her
heart that ached whenever she thought of her baby."
"Dawn, tell me what's wrong." He asked, fearing what she
was about to tell him.
"She was born, premature. She was so small and weak,
died two hours later in my arms."
Calvin stood when Dawn got up. He stood there, wanting
to scream, or cry. But no sound came out of his mouth.
He had a daughter, a little girl he never knew about. One
he would never have a chance to know.
She reached into the car and pulled out her purse. Taking
something out threw the purse back in and handed Calvin
a picture. "It's our daughter. I named her Cal Fisher, after
her daddy."
For the longest time, all he did was stare at the tiny infant
in the photo. She had the most beautiful face and pitch
black hair, the same as his. In the picture, Dawn was
holding her. She looked so sad and pale as she looked
down at their baby.
He pulled her into his arms and they both cried together.
He tore himself away and looked into her tear stained
face. It broke his heart to think she had to live with this all
these years, and alone. "If I had known I would have
found you. I'm so sorry."
"Calvin, I'm the one who needs to apologize to you. I
should have found a way to get word to you. But my
father-"
He laid a finger lightly on her lips. "I know. Because of
your father's lies, you must have hated me."
"I was hurt, but I never once hated you. I never stopped
loving you. There were complications during the birth. I
was told it would be impossible to have any more babies."
Calvin drew her back into his arms, his face touching
her's. "I love you. Hell, we can always adopt."
Dawn smiled up at him. "You would be willing to do that?"
She asked, her eyes lighting up.
When she smiled at him it warmed his heart. "In a
heartbeat. Will you stay?" He asked as he held her tight.
And when she nodded her head yes he closed his eyes,
thanking God.
Getting down on one knee he pulled a small box from his
back pocket. He opened the box and revealed a beautiful
diamond ring. "Will you marry me, Dawn Haworth?"
Her hand flew to her mouth when she saw the large
diamond. "It's beautiful, but when did you buy it?"
He gave her a sly smile. "The day you came back to
town."
"So sure of yourself weren't you?" She laughed.
"Baby doll, I'm not a teenager anymore. Please don't keep
me on my knees much longer. Will you be my wife?"
She thought her heart was going to burst from the
happiness she was feeling, she smiled. "Yes, oh God yes
I'll marry you."
Getting off his knees he slipped the ring on her finger, it
was a perfect fit. Pulling her close he lowered his lips
onto her's, kissing her with such an intense deep hunger.
Dawn felt herself being crushed as his strong held her
tight against him, but she didn't mind. Closing her eyes
returned his kiss with as much if not more passion than he
was giving her.
After all these years Calvin had finally gotten what he'd
been wanting. Dawn. She was back in his life, and he was
never going to let her go again.
To be continued.
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