Anger is one of the emotions bringing down great men and women. When one’s emotion of anger gets to a point where he no longer can control himself or herself, he reacts in a way that may cost his peace after. Most people when they are angry go the extra mile of assaulting their victims either verbally or physically attacking them which most of them turn out to regret their actions afterward.
Most promising people who had better life ahead of them are in prison cells and more unwanted places because they couldn’t control their anger. In this article, we will be sharing a few steps of what to do when you are angry or better still how to not get angry at all. Reading to the end will have a great impact on your life!
Here are a few tips on how not to get angry and what to do when you are on the verge of becoming angry.
Self-monitoring
Spot early warning signs of anger, to nip it in the bud before it escalates. For example, you might notice that your voice begins to change, or that you frown or your muscles tense, when you're beginning to grow angry, or you may think of someone's actions as unjust
or in violation of a personal rule
("How dare she say that to me!")
Cognitive distancing
Remind yourself that the events themselves don't make
you angry, but rather your judgments about them cause the passion. ("I notice that I am telling myself How dare she say that, and it's that way of looking at things that causes me to feel angry.")
Postponement
Wait until your feelings of anger have naturally abated before you decide how to respond to the situation. Take a breath, walk away, and come back to it a few hours later. If you still feel like you need to do something, then calmly decide upon the
best response; otherwise, just let it go and forget about it.
Modeling virtue
Ask yourself what a wise person such as Socrates or Zeno would do. What virtues might help you to respond wisely? In your case, it might be easier to think of a
role model you're more familiar with, like Marcus Aurelius or someone you've encountered in your own life. ("A wiser person would try to empathize, put
themselves in her shoes, and then exercise patience when they're responding.
Functional Analysis
Picture the consequences of following anger versus following reason and exercising virtues such as moderation. ("If I let my anger guide me then I'll
probably just yell at her and get into another argument, and things will get a lot worse over time until we're not speaking anymore. If I wait until I've calmed down and then try to listen patiently, though, it might be difficult at first but it will probably start to work better with practice, and once she's calmed down maybe she'll begin listening to my perspective.")
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