It’s just something that I want to share and hear what people have to say about it, personally I know that I’ve sinned, and this is how
I lived in the same house with this girl and others, we became close and she asked for a kiss after she lost a game we played together. I was scared because of where we live and besides I’ve never been that type of guy, even tho I’ve had feelings for the opposite sex, I’ve always not been bold to talk about it, somehow found myself masturbating which I know it’s a sin and currently working on to stop. So I went to her in her room and I told her I don’t know what I’ve come there to do but I’m sure it’s the kiss that brought me there, fast forward we kissed and it was intense and we somehow had sex twice that night, I felt bad, really bad and this kept on coming back to me.
I thought that was the end, but as time went on, we found ourselves bathing together and fucking ourselves in the bathroom, we had sex so many times that I lost count of.
She’s gone to school and before she left for school I was able to hold myself for 2weeks but right now I’m scared and I know she’ll be coming home soon and this girl doesn’t know the word no and she crave for this thing like crazy
I really wanna stop, I’ve prayed about it, I’ve asked for forgiveness and trying to overcome this lust, I’ve read books and watched videos and I’m still praying but I’m still scared because I don’t even believe in my own strength.
You might wonder why I still get scared even after saying I’ve been praying about it, it’s just because even the Bible ask us to flee from sin, but then fleeing is my problem and I know she’ll be coming after me for sure even if I flee!
Please I need help, like big time advice and how to go about this because I don’t want to live my life this way, I was not used to doing this but I lost my way and I’m trynna find my way back home This girl that I’m talking about loves me, she says I love you and I don’t even say it back, just okay.
Actually she’s a good girl. Like a wife material you know but I’m still young, 22 and I’m not getting married anytime soon, I really don’t think I love her, I’ve tried to but it’s not working but she does, like bad.
I’m not sure about her love, sometimes I feel it’s out of pleasure and if she’s just a sex addict who’s trying to drag me with her and it’s not love, and if I allow myself to love her, she might be fckng around, who knows. And this is why I think I don’t love her.
Meanwhile there’s this girl I’m in love with even I said I was not going to love again or for now after my first relationship but then I couldn’t stop myself from loving this girl, shez good and pretty just like the first one, but the first one respects and looks more like a wife material whiles this girl that I’m in love with isn’t really the wife material thing, she is very prayerful and sometimes reminds me of my spiritual work.
Now among this two, I really don’t know who to go for, I don’t really love the first girl even tho she’s good but then I feel her love is just pleasure for sex and nothing else and besides I want to do all I can to stop myself from having sex with her and I’m sure when that happens there’ll be no love.
The second girl be good and there’s no problem with her but I just don’t know what to do. Should I stay with the first girl or I should let her go with her sex addiction and focus on the other girl..
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